Posted by MD
HOW TO PRETEND TO BE A WISE SAGE IN 10 EASY STEPS.

1) Learn to resist worldy temptations such as entertainment, food, and women.

2) Grow a beard.

3) Dye your beard white.

4) Adopt a new philosophy that may or may not be dangerous, as long as it has never been attempted before.

5) Get a long white robe.

6) Learn how to sit crossed-legged with feet turned upwards for long periods of time.

7) Learn how to sit still for long periods of time so that yoou can meditate.

8) Learn how to chant. The basic chant would be "AUM..... AUM..." But if you want to achieve a more unique style of chanting more practise would be needed before "!#$%^&*" sounds like a calm chant.

9) Emigrate to a hard to reach place with horrible climate to test the spiritual strength and endurance of your seekers.

10) Should all else fails, sitting cross-legged on the top rung of an extremely high step ladder in an extremely cold air-con room in an undisclosed elusive location should work just as well.

~out, ResidentLoudmouthwantstoputherLOUDMOUTHtobetteruse~
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Posted by MD
To revive this DEAD BLOG *hint Liiyung and Mel*, I am going to post absolute crap interesting stuff about Durians. And how to open them. And what safety hazards they are.

Step #1: Hold the durian up by the stem.

Step #2: Check the base of the durian (the side opposite the stem). You should see the thorns growing in at some point forming a weird pattern. Kinda like an asterisk (*).

Step #3: Use knife/parang/screwdriver/sharp objects to cut the durian skin open along that weird asterisk pattern thingamabob.

Step #4: Stick your thumbs in between the crack for leverage and pry the durian open (this could hurt).

Step #5: Eat the durians.

Step #6: Pry the durian open a second/third time til all the durian flesh in one durian thingie are finished.

Step #7: Repeat Steps #1 - #6.

Important Tips
1) Step #2 and #3 are probably the harder steps to master.
2) Don't drop the durian on your foot.
3) Don't kick a durian.
4) Durians are dangerous.

~out, ResidentLoudmouthZiYing, DURIANS!~
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Posted by MD
This is the real deal, and this list is only compiled AFTER yours truly went through hell PMR. The whole thing is based on the author's experiences.

1) Put your stationary in a plastic container instead of a plastic bag. Plastic bags are a lot more noisy than containers.

2) Bring enough food. Exams make you hungry.

3) Bring your IC.

4) Bring enough money for lunch.

5) Bring a bottle that DOES NOT leak.

6) Put your bottle on the ground.

7) Try to gather as much tips as possible, even if that means calling your distant relative in Sabah.

8) Don't curse about the examinor within their hearing range unless you're positive that they don't understand you.

9) Don't fall asleep until you complete your paper.

10) Bring enough tissues so that you don't have to ask the examinor to get some tissues for you when you need it.

11) Wear a mask if you're sneezing. Not only do the students appreciate it, so does your examinor.

12) Don't leave your books opened on the corridors because if it rains, it's the end of your books.

13) Don't leave your books on the fire hose box near your friend's window. You don't want them to be accused of cheating... And even if you do, it's not nice.

14) I fyou happen to be sitting by the window and you notice a book outside at your eye level, do everything you can to GET RID OF IT. Who cares about the owner of the book? They shouldn't have put it there in the first place.

15) Do not consistently be the last one into the class. It's annoying, and people get tired of waiting for he same person to enetr so that they can start their paper.

16) If you HAVE TO be late for a paper, try to do it with your whole class and with a good reason. That way you get extra time.

17) Always keep your eyes open for interesting things that you can blog about. XD

See? Practical tips ain't as funny as the fake stuff, eh?

~ResidentLoudmouthwantstolearnabouthumanpsychology~
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