Posted by MD
I don't get Agony Aunt letters.

No, I don't mean that my mental capacities are that low, I meant that I don't get the people who wrote the letters to Agony Aunts. It just doesn't make any sense.

I mean, your problems can be solved with a little bit of common sense. Do you really need a complete stranger who probably doesn't give a shit about your life and who you are to state the obvious?

Or are you just enjoying seeing your problem in print?

Do you really sit down and calmly write a letter to the local Agony Aunt describing your problem in great detail yet not detailed enough for those close to you to identify you, then wait a month for Agony Aunt to reply your letter giving you advice before you decide on your next course of action?

I mean seriously, at this rate, even I can be an Agony Aunt.

Check this out.

(Letters taken at random from the internet and edited slightly)

Dear LoudR,

I have been friends with this guy for about two months, I’ve liked him a lot since I met him but I refused to say anything as he has a girlfriend. We’ve been flirting a lot and the other day he told me that he also likes me, I also told him that I liked him but he has a girlfriend so nothing can happen.

He asked me to kiss him which I’m almost ashamed to say that I did, then left. After he sent me a text saying that he was sorry if he made everything weird between us but he couldn’t hide how he felt and he didn’t want to jepordise our friendship but had to tell me. I replied that it hadn’t made anything weird and that we could still be friends. Since then we’ve spent a lot of time together revising for exams and talking getting to know each other better. I’ve made it clear where I stand with the fact he has a girlfriend.
He’s told me that things haven’t been going well with his girlfriend and that he’s just trying to find a way to break up with her without hurting her too badly and that he doesn’t want to mess me about.

I’ve asked my friends what I should do and they say to stay clear of him as he’s either using me as a replacement for his girlfriend who’s at a different university, or that I can’t trust him as he’s cheating on her and could do that to me in the future. I understand what they’re getting at but he has been nothing but honest with me since I met him and I trust him.

I feel really wrong and guilty about him having a girlfriend, but I don’t know what to do as I don’t want to push him away. How should I handle this?
In Love

Dear In Love,
It's obvious that this guy is a jerk. He has a girlfriend and yet he's trying to send you 'messages'. If he really did like you, he would break it off with the girl and court you like the way a man should.

And there's something wrong with you. I mean, kissing the guy when he already has a girlfriend? AND you only know him for two months? If he ever grows the balls to break up with his girlfriend and get together with you, you would be branded as a man-stealer for LIFE. So please, get a grip on yourself and move on, he is obviously just a waste of time.

Who's to say you won't be the next "girlfriend with whom things aren't working out"?
LoudR

Dear LoudR,
I have been in a relationship for over 2 years now but I don't feel the same as I did towards her anymore. Little things are annoying me and I'm just not happy. We are looking to move in together which I really dont want to do because I know it will be a nightmare. I'm not sure whether to ride it out or end it. I don't want to hurt her.
I used to have commitment issues and we have split over these before. We got back together because I really did love her but its less than a year since that and now I'm doubting whether I want a future with her. She will think its a commitment ‘thing’ again but it isn't.
Any advice would be great.
Confused

Dear Confused,
DUH. Break up with her. Who cares whether it's commitment issues or not? You can't live with her, and you've been with her for two years. Seriously man, save yourself the drama and just end it.
LoudR

Dear LoudR,
There's this boy I like but if I ask him out and he says 'no' I`ll be so so so embarrassed. How should I ask him out?
Afraid of Embarrassment

Dear Afraid,
Girl, gather your guts and just ask him! If you like him who gives a shit about embarrassment? If you don't try you'll never get your hands around your man!
LoudR

Dear LoudR,
I am 14 and I have a normal life but I am starting to get really unhappy because all my mates have boyfriends and I do not. No, I'm not the ugliest girl in school and many boys do like me, but I just have no fellings for them.
All my mates have had sex and I haven't! I realy want to but I want to find someone special to me that will make me happy. How can I get more boys to like me?
Help

Dear Help,
Getting more guys to like you will NOT help in getting you laid. That is because the boys your age most likely still have their squeaky voices and that is a big turn-off. And like you said, you want to find someone special, so wait. Be patient! Plus, you don't need a man to introduce you to the pleasures of sex. There are many other ways that you can explore on your own (I shall not elaborate as I intend to stay family-friendly on this blog)
LoudR

So there! Anyone planning to employ me as the next Agony Aunt for their newspaper? Leave a comment :D
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